Thursday, May 13, 2010

Pre-Marriage Workshop for Deafs

(Thank you to Lucy, Jessica, interpreters, and the speakers of sessions, and Rachel & YQ help to take photos)

Lucy invited me to attend the Pre-Marriage Workshop through an email. I can help to write this article about what we learn from this workshop. It can help to increase the deaf awareness about the marriage. All of you sure want to know what is about the marriage and what to do with this workshop when we attend this workshop, right? I heard from my best friend about a lot of deaf couples get to divorce each other, due to their issues. e.g. mature not enough, financial money, or abuse problem, not comfortable with a partner's lifestyle, stress works, lack trust & love and many...

That is why they prepare to educate the singles, couples, engaged couples and newlyweds in the skills, habits, attitudes, and enrichment techniques that research shows lead to happy, enduring marriages.

According to the marriage research, many partner get happy and found a right guy/woman in their 2rd marriage after divorce with 1st partner on first time. Why? They learn the mistake from their past marriage...

Do you ever worry about divorce and will break up with your partner? You may be aware a problem exists between you and your partner because you have chosen to be committed to each other, want to resolve it before you marry...

During this workshop, we got the opportunity to identify how:
  • Understanding and strong communication skills
  • resolve misunderstanding and conflict
  • Identify and build on your relationship strengths
  • Understand about the religion's marriages
  • Explore what is TRUE Love?
  • Personality issues
  • Financial management
  • Role relationship between husband and wife
If they want to stay together, they need to build the trust back up in the relationship and many ways which can lighten their problem. They need to explore the reasons to discuss about their issues.

They can learn each other when they can plan ways to manage money, your household, balancing work and togetherness, and dealing with possible intrusive family members and friends. Eg. the husband and wife can help each other to reduce stress in a house. From the marriage research - modern days now, why a husband love to help wife do the household, such as like cooking or clean house? Because the husbands believe that it can help to make them get long -lived and can low the blood pressure of heart. And it can lead to you grow together with happy marriage. It's correct! O_O My dad always do the household in his own house because he want to be healthy. My mom always tell me about must to clean house so, she complain alot about me lazy but, I am patient with my mom...Haha!

I think that Session 2: Getting to know you that is very laughable and funny - Learn the Identify Personality! My friends and I enjoy to play this game personality about four animals; lion, otter, beaver, and golden retriver dog.You sure know what is this meaning behind the animals' personality? :D After we explore our personality, I am Otter! because I am creative, enjoys change, friendly, energetic and fun-loving person! :D We also enjoy to learn about our friends' personality with jokes! Both partners need to see & know more about themselves. My mom always give an advice about I need be careful when I choose who to be my partner... She also worry if a guy have bad personality, eg. not helpful, lazy, greed, or don't like to work so hardworking. :P What about you?

It make both partner realise what are their personality and feel comfortable each other. They can share different or same interest in their life. Eg. In their lifestyle, a guy learn what she like, he can share with her. A girl will like his food when she try to eat his favorite food. Until they like each other if they learn more about their personal interest. Maybe? But, its good to know what thing that a partner don't like! Haha!

For me, this workshop are very educational and fun! We don't get boring while they try their best to give their session. They also answer the participators' question. Sometimes, we always joke each other and give our funny & stupid question! And I learn new things, eg. while dating, what will you do with your partner, and Hindu's marriage - interesting about same souls in present and past... O_o

More fun about the Session 6: Remember It's good to talk. It helps you communicate better in your marriage. Communication is extremely important to build good relationship. It make you understand each other’s views on marriage and family. Funny, Lucy also ask everyone about what are you doing with your partner when you both dating or couple always go together...! The participants also give different of answers...and sometimes joke...Maybe they are shy? :P
The participants' comments after what they learn from this workshop:

"We can use it as 'panduan' then we get to know about it better than regret or divorce. So, it guides us despite we know that it is a common issue of cases,at least it give us the guideline. That is why we gain good benefits." - TWK

"Saya sedar banyak pengetahuan berbeza perangai dan bagaimana selesaikan masalah keluarga dan kawan termasuk SENDIRI.. Kalau ceramah workshop tidak wujud.. dah pasti banyak orang buat kesilapan seperti bercerai dan kehilangan kawan baik." - YQ

"Pre-Marriage Workshop have good experience of how this workshop for the future means that we will be ready to plan the money, get married, new home and family life. For me okay but sometimes I was so sleepy and bored little in the workshop of 2 days because there is little activity related to the title only...But, I prefer learning about Session 2: Getting to know you, Session 3: Finance and The family and Session 6: Remember It's good to talk!" - RL
Finally, my best friend, K want to tell you all about her experience of marriage. My best friend, K says, many people asked her about divorce. We didn't take our risk as we didn't like to be divorce as their relationship are very good. I just learnt from our families especially important communicate each other so it will not make everyone misunderstand. If you keep to think about problem issues, useless. Important is you all try to make solution -eg: family discussion meeting. And.... many deaf people just curious and want to know if deaf can dating with a hearing guy/girl or cannot? Here, an interesting poll for you!

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